We're All Ideas People: Do More Than Is Expected

When in discussions with friends, I often get accused of willfully not understanding people’s behaviors.  “But why?” I ask, “Why would they do that?  Why wouldn’t they see how they are feeding into a way of thinking that hurts everyone, including them?”  I’m sure it’s very irritating to be around. But then I have to remind them all that I’m in my brain all the time, so they’re lucky they just get to dip their toes in.

Apparently, back when my brain was malleable, I spent too much time in classes that taught me always, always, to look for who benefits from systems and who gets hurt by them.  One of my favorite scenes from the Hunger Games is when the main character’s mentor reminds her to remember who the real enemy is.  It’s not the person pitted against you.  It’s the person who’s making you think you need to fight each other.

When I think about self-sacrifice this refrain goes through my head again and again.  Because I so want us all to be able to just give, give freely, allowing ourselves to be safe in community so that we can all give what we have and be cared for by others giving what they have.  That is my dream, after all.

But there are people who will use that sacrificial heart.  They will take what you have to give and twist it to meet their needs.  They will use you up and spit you out when you realize what they’ve used your gifts for.  So, be careful.  Be wise.  The willingness to go above and beyond is a more powerful thing than we realize.  But our society realizes how powerful it is and will try to shape it and control it into a more palatable version that doesn’t ask too much and never takes as much as it gives.

I don’t even know if it’s conscious.  I think a lot of people have been taught for so long that they are the “ideas” people and maybe taught a little bit that other people are for making the ideas happen.  It just so happens that the people executing the ideas tend to be poorer, or browner, or female. 

But we’re all ideas people.  Everyone has a gift to give.  Everyone, if given the chance, has creativity within them.  My mother ran creativity workshops as part of her job and one of the few things I remember from that time was that the scale of creative is not “more” or “less”, but “how”. 

I want us all to work sacrificially to build connections and community.  But I want you to do it in your way.  How the hell do I know what you have to give or what this community needs?  You have eyes and a brain – use them.  Do you see a need that you can do something about?  Looks like you have a task in front of you.  It’s scary, I know.  Much easier, sometimes, to just do what you’re expected to do.  But I’m tired of an expected community.  Our world needs more.  It needs you, in all your fullness.