It's Too Hot to Change the World

We’re having what passes for a heat wave over here in Seattle, which means the temperature hit 90 and we’re all moaning about how unbearable it is. I could complain that I don’t have air conditioning, but we didn’t have that when I was a kid in humid Pennsylvania, and we also didn’t have the beauty of the west coast’s dry heat. I’m not kidding, it’s 91 here right now, but since I’m sitting in the shade, it feels about 75 and I’m drinking a cup of hot tea. So there’s not too much to complain about.

At the same time, in these dog days of summer, I don’t want to do much besides sit in the shade. The kids have been pretty happy with our inflatable pool and it’s hard for me to remind myself that outside of my shady chair in the backyard, the world is facing very real problems. So my question today is, how do we stay motivated, even when life is pulling us in the direction of rest?

I happen to be married to one of the most motivated people in the world. If Forrest has a spare moment, he’s off somewhere working in the garden, or building an obstacle course for the girls, or just getting caught up on some fun project he’s got going for work. Frankly, it’s quite annoying. I’m more of a couch potato kind of person. But between figuring out working from home for two people, parenting full time with no breaks, camps or playdates, and then just keeping up with normal stuff while coping with the underlying stress of life, even he’s getting tired.

So how do we keep up this motivation? Can I confess that I think the answer is to stop trying? There’s a difference between distracting ourselves with meaningless clutter and truly letting ourselves get tired and rest. And the difference, I think, is in trusting ourselves. Too many times, I refused to trust the warning signals that predicted burnout. I told myself I was lazy, or that I was weak, or that other people would be fine under this burden. And then, when I couldn’t berate myself into keeping it up anymore, I crashed, watched too much stupid tv, and filled my time with the type of mental kitsch that kept me from acknowledging the truth: I have limits and if I don’t respect those, I’m going to end up dead in the water. No power, no direction, just floating along wherever the current takes me.

But if I trust those signals, refusing to give into the lies about comparison and weakness, I can keep moving forward. Maybe stopping to refuel or plot a new course, but still capable of getting where I want to go. Maybe in resting, I realize that I’ve been going about things wrong and I need to adjust. Maybe in resting, I let myself just grieve all these losses instead of running around like everything’s ok. Maybe in resting, I can look out at the bees doing their work in our poppies and remind myself that even they, the busiest of bugs, stay in when the weather isn’t to their liking.

So if you’re lacking motivation to change the world today, pull up a chair. Being tired isn’t the problem, it’s the symptom. Trust yourself. Take a break, and then figure out what’s next. We’re in this for the long haul, after all.