Wildfires and Paradoxes

I just read another sad news story in a litany of sad news stories. The wildfires in Los Angeles are still fresh in my mind. Even though we live in one of the wettest areas of the US, our summers are so dry that we also fear the wildfires. So far, the snowpack in the Cascades melts off slowly enough to keep the fire from our doors, but climate change brings the inevitable fear that we, too, will one day run from our house, subjects of an evacuation order.

There’s still time though, and from what I can see, the state government is doing a good job of preparing. Part of that preparation, paradoxically, is controlled burns of the undergrowth throughout the state. For the better part of a century, those in charge believed that any fire should be put out and as a result, our forests are full of fallen trees just waiting to burn. And burn they should, but hopefully not all at once and not when there is wind and drought conditions that will drag them out of control.

This policy is deeply controversial. Every time I read about it in the news, I think of how many of the most important goals in life require us to tolerate those paradoxes. Whenever my girls are struggling with homework, I remind them that in order to become knowledgeable, we must first learn to tolerate feeling dumb. No one ever learned anything by sticking to the easy stuff.

Saying that and doing it are two different things. Tolerating feeling dumb is a hard thing to do, especially in a world where people feel empowered to say the most awful things. And it’s not just learning. How intimidating is it to go to the gym for the first time – out of shape and uncomfortable, walking around and seeing people who look like they were born in a weight room? But there is no other way to fitness than to start when we’re not yet fit.

But if we are willing to tolerate the paradox – the discomfort of “not yet but perhaps soon” – we open up a world of possibilities. It seems to me that one of the keys to life happiness is the willingness to seem dumb, or unfit, or even a bit ridiculous. One foot in the adult recognition of  “not yet” and another in the childlike hope of “perhaps soon.”

I’m not sure what’s bringing up these thoughts today except that when it comes to the state of the world, I, too, am in a place of “not yet but perhaps soon.” We do not yet have a handle on climate change, but perhaps soon we will find the will to make the adjustments we have to. We do not yet have a world that values my daughters as much as it values your sons, but perhaps soon they will all learn that both men and women are better off when the hierarchies are destroyed. We do not yet have a world where the most vulnerable among us are protected, but perhaps soon we will agree that none of us are safe until all of us are safe.

Until that day, though, I’m going to sit in the middle of my paradoxes – studying new knowledge, attempting new skills, making new memories – and remembering my own words: No one ever learned anything by sticking to the easy stuff.